Thank You, Mister Window Smashy Man

Thank You, Mister Window Smashy Man.

I know I was dumb to leave an iPod charger cable in sight, and that lockbox that could have had money in it in plain view. Why didn't you steal the charger cable? The contents of that box weren't nearly as valuable.

I'm sure you liked examining my dice, small glass stones, geodes, and my little stacked turtle statue made of shells with heads that bob that my Grandma (God rest her soul) gave me because I always loved turtles.

I'm sure you are enjoying the foreign coins from all of my travels, my old pennies, and the small section of Bic pen tube with the suspicious blue residue on it. I surely hope that my passport serves you well, my rubber bands, and the statuette of the Egyptian Jackal God(EJG) that one of my ex-girlfriends brought me as a souvenir.

Maybe you will come across this post, and if so, what can I give you for my knick knacks and memories? You can keep the Gameboy games... I've beat them all and they wouldn't sell for a dime. I hope the EJG eats your face.